knife_bender | Baltimore

"That's not an ambulance," Steve said observantly, checking the gun he'd just requisitioned from the passed-out guy to make sure it was in good working order.

It was weird Diego looked excited about this, right? That was weird.

"I gotta admit you guys have pretty interesting date nights."

Danny shot him an annoyed look. One that got even more annoyed as the side doors on that van opened up to reveal a lot of people with guns. Like, a clown car of gun-toting criminals.

"This is your fault," he informed Steve, already moving to find cover.

"How is this my fault?" Steve demanded, ducking behind the always convenient dumpster while scoping out the situation.

At least they weren't down a dead end alley? Plus sides!

"Guys, guys, it's both of your fault." Diego ducked behind cover, immediately pulling out another knife.

You don't wanna know how many he had on his person at any given moment.

"Maybe they're just here to pick up their unconscious friend?"

The only reason their unconscious friend wasn't dead was because he was prone on the ground as his friends opened fire.

"What happened---"

Oh, spoke too soon. Bad time to sit back up, pal. Bad time.

"All this over some lizards? Seriously?" Danny grumbled, looking for something they could escape in because he was the only one unarmed.

That's what you get for being an NPC on a Baltimore trip in a police procedural canon, dude.

"Well, they were very lucrative lizards up until they caught fire," Steve said, tilting his head at the perky sounds of "I'm a Little Teapot" coming from down the street. "We might have a ride."

Steve. Steve. Pick a non ice cream truck ride.

Okay this time Diego was looking at Steve like he was nuts. "Seriously?"

If he only knew this would become a theme with him.

"If that thing explodes like the last one, you're banned from ever driving my car again." Did that fill Diego with excitement as well?

"This is the first thing to go past that'll fit three!" Steve argued, firing at the mobsters.

That's a fair point, Steve.

"Fine, but I'm not driving!" Diego yelled, before making a run for the ice cream truck.

"I really, really, truly hate you," Danny said with great emphasis, fully trusting Steve to cover them in the dash to the truck.

Steve grinned at him. "Yeah, I know. Now go!"

He laid down covering fire for them with his gun that magically never ran out of bullets.

At least Diego's childhood trauma paid off when it came to catching and getting into moving ice cream trucks while avoiding gunshots.

"Hey guy, get out of the truck unless you want to get shot by those guys or stabbed by me."

He did notice that the ice cream truck driver looked a little sketchy but didn't think much of it at the moment.

"Uhhh," sketchy guy said, staring at them and then over at where the gunfire was coming from. "...harsh."

And took off before anyone could question him further.

"Harsh," Danny muttered, getting into the driver's seat and revving the engine. "C'mon, babe! We don't have all day here!"

Steve dove into the truck like an overdramatic action hero.

"Can we kill the music?" he asked.

"I don't know, I think it adds something," Diego joked, heading towards the back so he could open the door. He hoped he'd be able to take out a tire or two.

"Adds something, that's for sure," Danny replied, taking a tight corner as the men behind them shouted angrily and took chase. "Hold onto somethin'!"

Which wasn't gonna great for them, considering how one tire of their van was rapidly deflating. But they had moxie, that's for sure.

Steve took hold of one of the standing freezers. "You guys want an ice cream sandwich or anything?" he asked.

"I'll take a Drumstick if they have any," Diego called before throwing a knife at one of the mobsters' tires.

He slammed his hand against the truck wall as a sudden swerve almost made him lose his balance. "Who taught you how to drive, Williams?"

"You wanna drive this thing through Baltimore?" he snapped, not glancing back. "I told you to hold on, Hargreeves."

Though, should they look below the thin layer of normal ice cream, there would be a lot of other kinds of treats there, waiting for them.

"I did not teach him to drive and he will richly deserve it if we get carsick," Steve said, nodding as he pulled open the freezer in the middle of a high speed chase like a totally normal person.

"Huh," he said, starting. "Well, we have a Drumstick. And a lot of pot."

"That seems about right," Diego said, shaking his head. "I'd be more surprised if we picked an ice cream truck that wasn't a cover for selling drugs."

"Your driving causes things to blow up," Danny snapped. Because an ice cream truck at a night, in the middle of Baltimore... of course it was a drug operation. "I swear to god--" He swerved sharply again as another van nearly took them out. "We got more!"

The coordinating was just a pain in the ass.

"I do not understand why they care so much about the lizards," Steve griped. "Think we can trade them the pot?"

Very ethical, Steve. Terribly cop-like.

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