Tiny shoes made excellent things to put in one's mouth, in fact.

"Kind of a bummer we missed newborn Halloween," Annie observed. "But they're probably too young to freak out if we dressed them up and took them to Santa. Most people kind of hate Santa, the first time they sit on his lap."

Some people, of course, were well-behaved men in their late twenties, but the twins would likely pass that milestone earlier than their dad had.